Saturday, February 6, 2010

Riding with Orion

"Thank God I am transparent to someone."
I heard him whisper and then the laughter
laughter like thunder
I was lost in that laughter as it has become my melody
I know our song makes God smile
and we sing it loud on the way home
like we were in church and we are
where nobody can hear, nobody but him
and nobody but me
his home on Pluto and mine on Mars
and in between navigating a thousand stars
Mars the red planet of passion and Art
Pluto, the planet of science and order
and duty
do de do de do
oh for just a little let me love you

And nowhere on the map
floating in space this planet we created
from dirt and the left over pieces of two lives
the secret pieces forgotten but not really
because tendering that garden of his
brings me such joy such joy that
in whispers I call it Eden
I am with him there now in a canoe
on a river of red wine
those blue eyes like Polaris
and the gentle smile that puts me at ease
lighting the night sky in my head
pushing the blood faster and faster
through my heart until I am left breathless

In the summer of turmoil I wanted to be a hunter again
and I thought of Artemis her brave troubled heart
wanting Orion to find her and admire her
Certainly if he could slay beasts with horns
she'd be safe, he'd keep watch
she'd make the cave tidy, she'd be the seductress

And when she saw him on the beach and their eyes met
and he fell on her, he raped her
a violent act wrapped in love's passion
he bit her neck and left his mark on her back
and her soul was transparent
and now I can hear her spirit wrapped in one of those
night lights whisper to me "I needed this"
and I knew
as we all know when we acknowledge we are again the hunter
when we can push aside the shame of admitting lonely
even in a room full of people who love us
lonely for the quiet whispers of lovers
who haven't given up hope not just yet
hope he will want you so much he will take what is his
and she will exhale and let go

Orion's passion for Artemis, her love for him
and her father's love for a daughter he never understood
keeps the nebula alive, it's lights, his belt
keeping time in the heavens
keeping the crops lit when the October skies
are quieted by the turning of the earth
the brushing of fallen leaves across the crops
and in the Pantheon of all the Gods
he sits reminding us that when we are brave
we are above this earth
and there is no larger possibility of pain than love
they don't make a warning system for a broken heart
my father took me to a range once where a man shot a 44
I can remember now the violence of his arm moving
and Artemis could remember him washing over her
long after he was in the night sky
leave your gun at the door and rip the Valentine into tiny pieces
then we're all safe

If you have and adventurer's heart and you find us
you stumble across our Eden
and you find on the beach Orion's massive body
unmoving marked with a scorpion and the arrow
of a saddened lover
And not far from there this scene of a treacherous act
on a path marked by the number 95
If you find our torrid messages of longing
strewn against the side of the road
from some collision
Don't think you aren't welcome
when we don't rush to greet you
we're busy you see, making up for lost time
time when we spent wondering where the other was
Who asks for someone to upset the waters?
for God's hand to create a tornado in your heart?
We do!
We are brave, we look, we try, we make room
where there is no room
we are the weed pushing through the crack in the cement
looking for just the tiny slice of the sun's warmth
we whisper, we struggle, we dig a moat
we wait pushing the world aside
and when its very quiet
on a Sunday afternoon
when the kittens are sleeping
when the coast is clear
when it's the dead of winter and the only thing not dead
is this red red heart beating and then waiting
to hear the other's beat
when its just the moment
when there are only two lovers in the entire world
you hear three words that fill you up and calm your soul
and make you want to build an entire
marble cathedral just to protect the flame of those two candles
and you can exhale as Artemis did
you can breathe easy knowing he finally fell on you
and there is no mattress to buffer the blows
of a passionate Mangod who wants and wants and wants
he'll drag you to the ground
and in a breath you'll let go
it's just what lovers do
at the point where there is no turning back
when the hunger is not a gendered organ
but a passion that fills your gut
and ultimately changes your soul

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